Monday 24 November 2008

Energy Efficient - Well We're Getting There

About two months ago our energy supplier E-On sent us and electricity monitor. These things look quite impressive and are very easy to set up. The main thing I discovered was that leaving the PC on all day cost about a quid, so it's something I now dont do , thus saving a bit of money.

However about two weeks back I noticed that the meter was about 33% up on its normal running level (£40 a month instead of £30) . Thought what was running at the time, two five live chandeliers (energy efficient bulbs) , the fridge , the heating , two PCs and the cooker clock, and....

a hallway light that used a standard 60 Watt candle bulb which was causing the increase . In theory replacing that with an energy efficient bulb has saved me about £5 a month. The new bulb did cost £1.99!

Sunday 23 November 2008

Some Snow

First winter snow, this end of 2008 , it's cold but all gone by dinner time. Took a few photos and bit of video then realised that I'd lost my battery recharger .

Also found out how slippy it can be as well , not looking forward to the journey to Darlington tomorrow. Anyway here are the pictures soundtracked by the Excellent Teenage Fanclub doing "Christmas Eve" from the excellent "Cool Cool Christmas" album available here.

I-POD Therefore I AM (a Pod Person)

I've never really liked Apple. Yes they're stylish , yes they're innovators (well good and nicking other people's ideas and selling absolutely idiotic ones). Apple products are easy to use use, do what they say on the box , but as soon as you step away from that box you're scuppered, as illustrated in this brilliant spoof:

I saw an advert recently on a bus , the prize offered was an I-POD. That's what it says in big letters and then in small letters it admits it's actually an i-Shuffle , and 1 in 100 CORRECT entries were guaranteed to win. Entry is £1.50 by Text. A 1 GB i-Shuffle costs less than £50 , you do the Maths, The kids in the ad look as though they couldnt even breathe withhout assistance!! Also the the with Apple is the Carrier is more important than the content , and it seems to me that is how most of it's target market act.

I hate the duo coloured i-Pod Ads , but theres been the odd decent spoof such as this Met Police one:

Don't we all feel like doing that!!

Tuesday 11 November 2008

Seven Days In The Premiership

Being a Preston North End supporter, I don't have much to do with the Premiership, though living in Newcastle it's unavoidable. There's been a couple of incidents that have struck over the past week.

The first is Arsene Wengers rant against Stoke City's so called physical approach. He managed to fool even me. Failing to mention Adebayor's high challenge on DeLap and Robin Van Persie's sending off he went off on one about Stoke trying to injure his players. Everyone was focussed on Wenger's rant, NO ONE was thinking about the Arsenal team (with a bad injury list), and their current bad run. What do they do against a rampant Manchester United? The win and put their Premiership challenge back on course. Again Wenger shows his genius , taking all the flak while the team sorts itself out and returns to winning ways. The guy is a veritable god!!

Secondly the Referee's Ruling body want to get their Respect Campaign back on track following run ins with Joe Kinnear of Newcastle and Alex Ferguson , to name but two. They seem to conveniently sidestep the fact that respect must be earned , and regard any form of criticism as an attack on them. When they screw up there seems to be no comeback and and anyone who dares say anything is pilloried.

Take the goal that never was in the Watford vs Reading match. No action against the officials but Adrian Boothroyd , the Watford manager was censured for his criticism of the officials.

The latest is the situation with Barnsley's Iain Hume being hospitalised in the match against Sheffield United, the referee refusing to take action against some very physical action.

In and Everton v Liverpool derby Jamie Carragher wrestled Jolean Lescott to the ground on three occcasions and the referee di nothing, but was quick to red card Tim Hibbert after he'd touched Steven Gerrard in the area (after a word for Stevie G).

Until referees get it right and stop acting as though they're infallible they are not going to get respect , unless their name is Pierluigi Collina.

And now we have the Maradonna "Hand of God" thing raising it's head again. Maradonna got away with it , the referees / officials should have taken action at the time . They didnt because FIFA / UEFA encourage cheating, simulation is rewarded with free kicks and cards for the opposing team.

Monday 10 November 2008

Supposedly a Real B& Q Application Form

Dont know if this is real or not, but is still very funny.

This is allegedly an actual job application that a 75 year old pensioner submitted to B&Q in Tunbridge Wells. They hired him becausehe was so funny…..

NAME: Kenneth W (Grumpy Bastard)

SEX: Not lately, but I am looking for the right woman (or at least one who will cooperate)

DESIRED POSITION: Company’s Chief Executive or Managing Director. Butseriously, whatever’s available. If I was in a position to be picky, Iwouldn’t be applying in the first place - would I?

DESIRED SALARY: £150,000 a year plus share options and a Tony Blair style redundancy package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.


LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

PREVIOUS SALARY: A lot less than I’m worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It was a crap job.


PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30-3:30 p.m. Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they’re better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?


DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the more appropriate question here would be “Do you have a car that runs?”

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be a winner of the Reader’s Digest Timeshare Free Holiday Offer, so they tell me.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job - no! On my breaks - yes!

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy Swedish supermodel with big tits and who thinks I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread.

Actually, I’d like to be doing that now.



Whether or not your next application is like this is up to you, but dont blame me if you don't get the job!!

Blue Harvest, Star Wars and The Family

Just think that this is one of the greatest spoofs ever. Leia recording the help message is one of the many spot on hoots in this 46 minute episode , which you can only get as a stand alone DVD:

The cover is brilliant containg the disc featuring Peter as Han Solo, Bryan the dog as Chewbacca and Stewie as Darth , a must have artefact for every household.

Though if you want to go even more extreme there's always American Dad

Three series so far and still not ben pulled!!

Wednesday 5 November 2008

Guards, Guards ...Public Service Please

I'm not trying to avoid paying , I really want to and I dont want to shut down all the local Post Offices.

But can someone tell why theye have up to six ticket inspectors on Darlington Station every morning (this has been the situation for six months , and recently they also have them on Newcastle Station.

By this time you would think they could have some kind of simple permanent barrier (like Durham) to stop potential fare dodgers.

Another thing is Post Offices . There's a huge furure over potential closures , but it took me thirty minutes to post a CD to Italy , thanks to one clerk behind the four positions. That's a guaranteed way to lose custom!!!